Life on The Edge

Life on The Edge

Last week I spent a few days at Esalen www.esalen.org in Big Sur Ca. The amazing retreat center for gathering,learning and reflecting.The time I spent in the natural hot springs bath that overlooked the Pacific and the fun loving Sea Otters below seems to continue to bring me awareness to my journey.It was challenging for the first 24 hours to unsuccessfully still my distraction achieving mind. I kept checking my phone messages & emails. There were of course none there but anything was better than stillness. Whew it was like a fever that broke then I was blessed with calm. Its not the first time I have experienced that but it still catchs me off guard.

Since then I have thinking about all the ways I busy myself rather than be still.Most of them not very productive other than getting high marks for distraction. So I wondered about this need I have had to achieve & collect trophy's "of all sorts" in my life. Thankfully that need has abated but in its place is an unsettled sense of a need to know what awaits. Which is just another distraction of course.

I had a dream(while I was awake) that on my "judgement day". I don't really believe there is such a day but if there was,there would be two lines waiting to get in.
One would be the high achievers line with their arms full "life resumes"~ The other line was those that "loved well" that meaning being able to give and receive love.
I wondered which line would be longer?? This is of course only a dream! Or is it??

Namaste
Garry

He Died at his Desk

I have been unable to release that phrase from my mind for weeks. A friend in NY called me to tell me about a guy he knew slightly who was 46 years old and that he had died at his desk while working.

I have been wondering if this man was living his dream and had he found his deepest passion. I also wondered if being at his desk would be the location he would have chosen and been happy with for his last breath.

Or was he not prepared and waiting for another time or next year to explore, develop or reconnect to the deepest part of himself in his work or other aspects of his life.

Having been at "my desk" for 25 years in NYC construction industry and not living but going through the motions waiting for another 5 years to add one more week to a cherished vacation that could never live up to the expectations of a 52 week wait.

A wonderful book Yoga and The Quest for The True Self written by Kripalu Yogi Stephen Cope sums it up beautifully that through our Yoga practice we will learn to become aware. It is through self inquiry that we will have no other choice but find our own "True Self".

My desk now is my yoga mat and I no longer wait 52 weeks to enjoy my life.

Namaste
Garry